The sun is shining through the clouds

My posting has been next to nothing. I've been spending a little more time on my educational blog for my graduate class, and with so much going on, I haven't had a chance to just sit down and type. Well, I've realized that even though I encounter frustrating moments, the sun always ends up shining through. My life has been great these past two weeks, but it has taken me quite a while to realize why my emotions can feel like they are on a roller coaster.

A couple weekends ago, I went through a real slump. I was literally battling with my identity. I was constantly getting into arguments with my mom, and I was having a hard time just coming home to my family every day. I just wanted to move out and find my own place...ALONE! However, after spending a weekend with this one person that I've known for quite a few years, I realized that every time I conversed or spent time with this person I become frustrated, irritated, and depressed, along with many other angry emotions. When I broke away from the relationship by avoiding contact, I felt and feel so much better. As much as it is hard to do, I've realized this person is draining and taxing on my emotions, and I need to be around people that are uplifting and leave me wanting to spend more time with them.

People have been trying to tell me it for a couple years, but I just kept pushing them aside because I didn't think it was true. However, after whatever spiritual attack I had that weekend, I realized I couldn't handle it any longer. Jesus is my only joy, but I was far from feeling joyful a couple weeks ago. As I've been mostly to myself and my family these past couple weeks I've realized how much more joy I have. I love my life. I love my relationship with Christ. I love my job and am sooooo excited to see how God is going to open doors next year. I love where I'm at in my education with my MA program and ASD endorsement. I am BEYOND excited for Zambia. I even love that God allows me the opportunity to go swing dancing, which is my favorite thing to do outside of church, work, school, and family. I also love and appreciate that I have an amazing family that always support me and a small group of wonderful friends that have similar interests and aspirations.

Overall, I'm just blessed at how much God has been revealing to me. Even though sometimes it can be painful to let things go, I know it is for the best. Here are three verses that I've been reading:

• "Blessed are those who hunger and thirst for righteousness, for they shall be filled." (Matthew 5:6)
• "Be still, and know that I am God; I will be exalted among the nations, I will be exalted in the earth!" (Psalm 46:10)
• "And we desire that each one of you show the same diligence to the full assurance of hope until the end, that you do not become sluggish, but imitate those who through faith and patience inherit the promises." (Hebrews 6:11-12)