A call to fast

The Call is approaching! I'm SOOOOOO excited that I can barely contain myself. Twenty-four hours of crying out to God with thousands of other believers is going to be an experience I will never forget. My heart's desire is to be that Elijah generation. I want to pray without ceasing. I want to pray until God moves. 

In preparation for The Call, we have been asked to fast. However, I realized not many people understand the true purpose of a fast. Honestly, I guess I never knew the extent, until reading Isaiah 58. After reading, it made me realize that I just might have, in the past, done exactly what the prophet tells us NOT to do. 

I've decided to break Isaiah 58:1-9 down. In the first part, Israel is crying because they feel as if they worship God all the time but aren't seeing Him move in their circumstances. God is telling them that they act pious.

 ¹ “Shout with the voice of a trumpet blast.
      Shout aloud! Don’t be timid.
   Tell my people Israel of their sins!
    ² Yet they act so pious!
   They come to the Temple every day
      and seem delighted to learn all about me.
   They act like a righteous nation
      that would never abandon the laws of its God.
   They ask me to take action on their behalf,
      pretending they want to be near me.
 ³ ‘We have fasted before you!’ they say.
      ‘Why aren’t you impressed?
   We have been very hard on ourselves,
      and you don’t even notice it!’

God rebuttals them and explains the wrong reasons for fasting:

   “I will tell you why!” I respond.
      “It’s because you are fasting to please yourselves.
   Even while you fast,
      you keep oppressing your workers.
 ⁴ What good is fasting
      when you keep on fighting and quarreling?
   This kind of fasting
      will never get you anywhere with me.
 ⁵ You humble yourselves
      by going through the motions of penance,
   bowing your heads
      like reeds bending in the wind.
   You dress in burlap
      and cover yourselves with ashes.
   Is this what you call fasting?
      Do you really think this will please the Lord?

God then goes on to explain this is why we should fast:

 ⁶ “No, this is the kind of fasting I want:
   Free those who are wrongly imprisoned;
      lighten the burden of those who work for you.
   Let the oppressed go free,
      and remove the chains that bind people.

In terms of fasting, we can't just crawl into a corner and pray for things to happen. We need to actively serve. Jesus expected to serve and not be served (Matthew 20:28). So, we should have this same mindset. We need to put our words and thoughts into action, not just sit back and wait for God to move. In order to see the change, we must be the change.

⁷ Share your food with the hungry,
      and give shelter to the homeless.
   Give clothes to those who need them,
      and do not hide from relatives who need your help.

By following His idea of a fast, this is what will happen: 

 ⁸ “Then your salvation will come like the dawn,
      and your wounds will quickly heal.
   Your godliness will lead you forward,
      and the glory of the Lord will protect you from behind.
 ⁹ Then when you call, the Lord will answer.
      ‘Yes, I am here,’ he will quickly reply.

A fast is NOT for pleasure. It is NOT to be done with a horrible attitude. Well, then what really is the purpose of a fast? Fasting is supposed to break the chains of injustice, free the oppressed, cancel debts, etc. It is supposed to bring us closer in our walk with God. We fast to intercede. We fast to see God move in a situation.


Going back to what I originally started this post out with. If you haven't heard of The Call, I suggest you go check it out: The Call. God is going to move mightily. I can't wait to see how He uses us, His people. Be prepared world because there is an army rising up. An army that does not back down. An army that is keen to every move that might be thrown at them. This army is going to fight and this army is going to win!

Just waiting

Can I just be real for a second? I, honestly, believe that guys do not have emotions. I cannot understand how they can say they like a girl and then two second later, get over them and be interested in someone else. Girls get attached, and it takes more than a second to get over them. I feel like most guys do not grasp this concept. However, when they go and make a move like telling them their interested in someone else, it definitely forces a girl to move on quickly...and not look back.

Okay, if you haven't figured out, this happened to me, but you know what? It was honestly the best thing ever. No, I didn't cry over it. There's no point because I realized part of me had already moved on. However, I am slightly disappointed in the person, but I'm mostly mad at myself. Why, you ask? 1. I let my guard down and allowed someone to step in a take a very tiny part of my heart, but it was a part of my heart, nonetheless. Many people do not consider what happened to be taking part of my heart, but because I have no relationship background, it was a very VERY tiny part of it. 2. I wished I could backtrack and have made different decisions. 3. I wished I didn't get emotionally attached.

Even though I might be mad at myself, I am not, at all, regretting anything. Actually I am very thankful for it. It made me realize that I let my guard down too easily and allowed someone, who I (at one time) cared about, to step in. I have also come to the conclusion that I have to force myself to not get emotionally attached to a guy until both he and I realize that we're supposed to marry each other. I realized that when I do meet my future husband, he will have to work VERY hard to enter my heart. I'm going to force him to stay outside until I'm ready to awaken love. This is just another reminder of Song of Solomon 2:7.

How did I get past this so quickly without any hurt? I gave it to God. Okay, I know it sounds slightly redundant, but I did an activity that I learned from doing Emotionally Healthy Spirituality (EHS) with my church last year. I wrote the person a letter; however, it's a letter that I will NOT send. This letter allowed to me to say everything that I wanted to say. It allowed me to vent and let out everything I was bottling up. I'm taking that letter along with a few other things and will be burying it...literally, burying it. What happened in the past, stays in the past. I'm moving on and looking forward to all the wonderful things God has in store, which I know will include my amazing, God-fearing, heart-guarding husband. However, until that time comes, I am going to remain asleep in God's loving arms.

Life is full of heartbreaks, but God is the ultimate Healer. It is at the Cross that I am renewed and find rest. Thank You, Jesus, for Your unfailing love. Thank You for restoring me to the person You created me to be. I am blessed to serve an amazing God, like You!!

All of this has reminded me of an amazing song that three young ladies wrote a few years back: "Average Girl" by BarlowGirl.

There's no such thing as normal

So I've come to the conclusion that there is no such thing as normal. In a couple posts over the last month, I kept talking about having to get used to this idea of life as it is being normal or normal finally settling in. As soon as I say that, I'm pretty sure God, who of course has a wonderful sense of humor, decides to completely rock my world in one way or another. These moments are definitely bittersweet.

God has really been teaching me on this concept of just trusting Him and glorifying and praising Him in every situation. From Psalm 57 to Psalm 63, God is just reminding me through the words of David why I need to praise Him and why I desire to praise Him.

Also, God has been reminding me that He holds onto all His promises. Studying Romans, and specifically Romans 4 this past week, I am reminded that God never fails. He always comes through on everything that He has promised from Sarah having a child to Abraham being a father of many nations. However, this passage reminded me that our timing may not always being the same timing God has planned.

This is soooo true with my life. In the past I was typically patient and content with waiting, but as I have grown, I have found this patience to fall to the wayside. I've been sucked into the world's idea of instant gratification. Sadly, I need to pull away from this. I need to remember, with my job being an example, that God's timing is perfect and that there is a reason He does not allow certain things to happen right away.

As for relationships, which I've brought up in the past, God has really been drawing me to this idea of not awakening love until the time is right. I've become content with who I am and who God is changing me to be. Sometimes I find it hard though as my two greatest desires were to work as a teacher and get married. Now that I'm employed as a teacher, I am anxiously waiting and anticipating the second desire. However, I HAVE to keep reminding myself that God's timing is perfect and I just have to trust Him. It even says in Song of Solomon 8:4: "Promise me, O women of Jerusalem, not to awaken love until the time is right."

Now continuing on this topic, I came across this artist, Teshuva, who are a husband and wife team (Sam and Angela). I love their style, but most importantly, I love the lyrics of their songs. Two of their songs are love songs that they wrote for each other to sing on their wedding day, one from her point of view and the other from his point of view. I feel that it is very connected to what I've been writing on and will include a link to both the songs at the bottom of this post. Angela sings ("Arms of Love") about not awakening love but goes on to relate how that love between husband and wife is an example of Yahweh's love for us. Sam sings ("All I Want") about not entering in to take a piece of her heart and how he will sit outside and wait for her to wake. Teshuva has it right when it comes to love. They understand that love and affection is not just an emotion that can be played with, but something that must be taken seriously. Most importantly, when that love is found, we need to wait for God's perfect timing. We need to be reminded that the love that comes from a relationship is just a mere glimpse of God's amazing love for us, His creation. Love really is one of the most powerful, if not THE most powerful, emotion that God created, and although heartbreak happens, it is such a wonderfully mysterious part of life. And this is just one reason I anxiously anticipate marriage :)