Just when things were looking up

"You is kind. You is smart. You is important" - Kathryn Stockett, The Help

I feel like, right now, this quote is continuously running through my head. Now, grant it, I haven't heard it in a long time, but after a series of events, I've come to the conclusion that I need to do things for me. I'm tired of giving and giving and seeing little in return. I'm not talking about my job or my volunteer work but relationships.

I hate feeling insignificant. Not that I want to be put on a pedestal BUT and this is a BIG but, I hate feeling like I'm nothing. I hate feeling like a satisfaction fix. Mostly, I want to despise those people. Unfortunately, I can't because I love them too much. Every ounce of me, right now, wants to run away, call it quits, and just go on living like nothing ever happened.

In a sense, it's been a great reality check. Why? Well, I've realized the following about myself:

1. I'm beautiful. I may not have a bombshell, rocking body or the perfect figure, but I'm beautiful on the inside and out. I'm old-time classy. I do whatever I can to look first-class...even when I'm going for a run. I dress to impress.
2. I'm educated and smart. I love learning new things every day. I love the challenge of bettering myself.
3. I'm talented. I have a TON of gifts. Not only can I do the typical housewife stuff (i.e. cook, clean, bake, etc.), but I can be completely independent. I am willing to learn to fix just about anything. I could run a house without the help of any man. Heck...who needs a man, when I can do it by myself?!?! I mean on top of all that I can be slightly artsy. I sing and play instruments ;-) I mean come on! Haha. And of course there's more...but I'll stop tooting my own horn. :-P
4. I have my head on straight. My life, for the most part, is pretty much in order.
5. Most importantly, and yes this should have gone first, I LOVE Jesus. He is my Cornerstone. 

I'm tired of waiting. I'm tired of feeling like I'm stooping down to a level I shouldn't. I was raised better than that. I should want to associate with people who are like-minded. Why do I feel like I'm on waiting for a pointless ride that is broken and never going to get fixed? It's like I'm waiting hours in line to ride my favorite roller coaster, only to find out when I get to the top that it's broken and I can't ride it. 

So back to the quote. I am kind! I am smart! Most importantly, I am IMPORTANT! I am important to Jesus and that's all that matters. I need to live my life for me and pleasing the God who created me. I'm done being a people pleaser. It's just about me and God from now on!